


terms and conditions

by WattStalf



Series: Ever-Changing Terms [1]
Category: The Walking Dead & Related Fandoms
Genre: Anal Sex, Crossdressing, Face-Fucking, Forced Feminization, Golden shower, If you read this I will be sad, Kink Meme, M/M, Not All Tags Apply to All Chapters, Omorashi, PWP, Watersports, and it makes no sense, blowjob, dub con, its really not as much noncon as dubcon, non con, please dont read this i hate myself, please dont tell my grandmother about this, seriously there is no plot, tags added later, the shame never stops
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-01-19
Updated: 2016-03-25
Packaged: 2018-05-14 23:49:03
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 6
Words: 9,579
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5763613
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/WattStalf/pseuds/WattStalf
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Rick is forced into an uncomfortable arrangement with Negan, but soon begins to question just how forced it really is.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> My first Walking Dead fic, and Jesus Christ, why do I do the things I do. Uh, so I noticed no one has really filled any prompts in a while on the kink meme, and I decided to try my hand at one and hopefully get the ball rolling again, and maybe more people will write.  
> But this story is like. I mean there is no plot and makes no sense if you think about it, but if you just turn off your brain and enjoy the smut, it might not be too bad. I dunno, please don't tell my grandmother or mother-in-law about this.  
> Prompt: Negan loves to see a defeated Rick beggin for him to fuck him. It's no surprise though, he has the man eating from the palm of his hand, all he had to do was threaten the younger leader to kill everyone in Alexandria and Rick became his to do as he pleased.

“This is just great,” said Negan, so cheerfully that it felt out of place, “just really fucking great. You know? I mean, Christ, I never was into dudes before, but this fucking opportunity, I just could not pass it up, and I didn't expect you to motherfucking do it!” He laughed. “But now I got you here like this, and you can bet your sweet ass I'm gonna fucking take advantage of it.”

Rick kept his eyes trained to the ground and held back the biting remarks that threatened to spill out. He was no accustomed to submission, especially not like this, but he had been forced into a situation where that was the best option. All he could do was tough this out and get through it, and hope that there was a better way out later. But for now, he was stuck like this.

The arrangement had been simple; Negan had his people hostage, had managed to get the upper hand, and would have killed them all just for kicks and Rick had been so desperate to save them that he resorted to something he had not done in a while. He had begged and pleaded and Negan had liked that and had said he would consider it if Rick had really meant it when he said he would do anything.

Of course, Rick insisted that he had, and Negan had returned with his terms: Rick would be his to fuck, however he pleased, and they would all be safe. It was horrible, it was demeaning, and it was almost out of character for the older man, appreciating women as much as he did, but those were his terms. Whether he really wanted to fuck Rick or whether he would just do it for a laugh did not matter.

So that was the position he found himself in, with Negan openly admitting that he wasn't really into it, but that he was going to do it anyway, and if there was any way out of this now, Rick did not see it. All he could do was keep his mouth shut and his head down and pray the older man got bored of this quickly.

“So, first things first, I think we gotta start with something real fucking basic, right? You remember when we first met, all those jokes I made about sliding my dick down your fucking throat?” He gave a hearty laugh at the memory and didn't wait for an answer from Rick before saying, “Well, guess what's coming first?” Again, he didn't wait for an answer. “You fucking guessed it!”

He placed a heavy hand on Rick's shoulder then, and gave him a rough shove. Rick dropped to his knees, and Negan laughed again, harsher than before. He unbuckled his belt and Rick noticed for the first time that there was a slight bulge in his tight jeans, exposing the fact that he was aroused despite saying that he wasn't actually into this sort of thing.

“Fucking look at me,” he said, grabbing Rick by his hair and yanking his head back while he unzipped his jeans with his other hand. His neck hurt as he was forced to look up, but he didn't drop his head when Negan let go. “That's more like it, bitch.” He pulled out his semi-erect member, which was already a good deal larger than had been expected, and it was not even at full size.

“Now,” said Negan, “I can't just fucking give this to you, you know? I mean, I could, but that just wouldn't be right. You were so fucking eager to beg earlier, let's see you do that again now.” His smirk was so malicious it bordered on evil, a sharp contrast to the easy, cheery grin he usually wore.

“I'm not begging for that!” protested Rick, unable to hold his tongue this time. It was one thing to beg for his life and the lives of his people, it was one thing to give over his body like this, but it was another thing entirely to beg to be used and degraded. It was another thing entirely to beg for Negan's cock.

“Oh, yes you fucking are,” he replied. “You're gonna fucking beg for it, or I'm throwing you back out there and you can tell everyone how you fucked up.” His smile never faded, but his tone was threatening. “Final fucking offer, Rick. Going once, going twice...”

“Please,” he said weakly.

“What was that?”

“Please,” he repeated. “Please, let me...let me suck you off. I need it...”

“And sold, to the pathetic fucking gentleman on his knees!” declared Negan with an obnoxious laugh. “That's good, that's real fucking good, but I think you can do better than that. Ya gotta convince me you want it, right?”

Rick steeled himself, more humiliated than he could recall being in a long time. He stared up at Negan, trying to look as earnest as possible. “Please,” he said, his voice steady. “Please give me your cock. I'll do anything, just please let me suck you off. _Please_.”

“Jesus fucking Christ, this is too good,” he said, shaking his head. “Too fucking hilarious.” But his cock twitched, growing harder, and it was evident that he wanted this more than he would let on. “You want this?” he asked, gesturing. Rick nodded, and his smirk grew into an all-out grin, still malicious in nature. “Alright, then, you've fucking got it!”

He pressed his tip against Rick's lips, and Rick hesitantly parted them. That was all that Negan needed and he forced it the rest of the way in, filling Rick's mouth and nearly causing him to gag on the massive length. But Negan didn't wait for him to recover before he began rocking his hips, forcing his cock further into Rick's mouth, placing a hand on the back of his head and not allowing him to pull back.

He thrust roughly into Rick's mouth, his cock reaching his throat, choking him. He could barely breathe and tears sprung up in his eyes as he gagged, but Negan did not let up in the slightest, grunting and moaning as he fucked Rick's mouth. There was no telling how long he did this, but it felt like an eternity as he was overwhelmed by the musky scent of Negan's mounting arousal and the taste of his sweat.

Finally, he began to buck his hips more rapidly, his breathing growing very labored and his moans growing shorter and sharper. He was almost there and he pulled his cock out all at once, his seed exploding onto Rick's face as he did. Negan let out one final, satisfied groan, chuckling lightly as he examined the mess he had made.

Rick wiped away what he could with a hand, but his mouth had still been open and much had gotten in. He had no choice but to swallow, trying to ignore the way the strange taste made his stomach turn. His breathing was more ragged than Negan's now, and his throat ached terribly.

“You can't act so high and mighty now,” mumbled Rick, once he had regained his composure and caught his breath.

“The fuck is that supposed to mean?” asked Negan, sneering down at him.

“You go on about how terrible you think rape is, and want to punish so harshly for it, but you're no better,” he spat.

“Is that right?” Negan said, picking up Rick by the collar of his shirt. “Is that fucking right? Because, last time I checked, you fucking begged me for this.” He shook the man, anger flashing in his eyes.

“Because you made me!”

“Except I didn't, did I? I gave you a fucking choice, and you have your way out at any time,” he snarled. “Sure, it's not a fucking good choice, but you didn't have to take it. Fuck, you didn't have to do any of the things that got you and your people into this fucking situation, but you did. It's not my goddamn fault all of you are so fucking stupid and don't know how to respect me.”

He dropped Rick, looking down at him again as he continued, “But I've been fucking generous. By all means, you guys deserved this shit, but I gave you a way out because I'm real fucking nice like that. You could have said no, and you didn't. So don't fucking say I made you do anything and don't you fucking accuse of that shit again.”

Rick didn't meet his eye and did not respond. He had agreed to this, yes, but to him, there hadn't been any other choice and there was no hiding the fact that he didn't really want it. Negan's excuses didn't change his actions, but he seemed firm in his belief that he had not crossed that line. And maybe he hadn't. With the world gone to hell like that, maybe even these lines had been blurred and maybe Rick had given full consent. Maybe to an onlooker, he would have looked like he wanted it.

“I'll be back later,” said Negan, turning to leave the room. “Better not even fucking think about trying to break out. I'm nowhere near done with your ass.” He gave a good laugh at that, as if there were a joke hidden in that statement.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Because I have no control of my life, I'm going to be writing one or two more chapters of this. Someone stop my sinfulness before I go too far.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I didn't expect this to go this far and this fast, but here i am. I am so, so sorry.

Rick had no way of telling time in the room he was in, but he was sure that hours had passed with no sign of Negan. It hurt him to swallow, and he couldn't get the taste of the man's semen out of his mouth. He had never in his life been so degraded, had never been made to do something like that and had certainly never done something like that willingly.

All of it felt so fucked up and wrong, and though there was comfort in knowing that he had done it for a good cause, that comfort was small because there was a part of him that was curious. That part of him was curious about what else was in store and curious about doing that again, and curious about why Negan would want it when he had insisted again and again that he wasn't that way.

Rick was curious, whether he liked it or not, and curiosity was not where his feelings on the subject ended. That, he knew he didn't like, but what did it matter if he didn't like the fact that he might have liked doing that? If had liked it, if he did like that, what did that say about him? What kind of person did it make him if he could hate something that much, yet enjoy it?

That was so sick and so fucked up that he could hardly bear to think about it, but there wasn't much else to do in here besides reflect on what had just happened and what it meant for him. Soon enough, Negan would be back to subject him to more torment, and he wouldn't know if he was supposed to hate every second of it or sit back and enjoy the ride.

When his captor did at last return, he slammed the door open and called out, “Honey, I'm motherfucking home!” before cracking up, as if he were the most hilarious man in the world. Rick cringed, but did not otherwise react.

“And how's the little slut been while I was away?” asked Negan, closing the distance between the two of them. “Stand the fuck up,” he commanded, and Rick did as told without protest. “Yup, looks like you've been doing fine while I was gone, just fucking fine.”

Like always, Rick said nothing, and Negan grabbed him by his shoulders, pulling him in close and leaning into his ear. “Now, I'm sure you know I've got more shit planned for you, right? Of course you do, you're not a complete fucking idiot.” He nipped at Rick's ear and laughed at the shudders that went through his body at that. “Christ,” he said, pulling back, “that trick works on fucking everybody. Never fucked a girl that wasn't putty in my goddamn hands after that one. Never fucked a guy, period, but there's a first time for everything, right?”

The only furniture in the room was a small bed, barely big enough for the two of them, but Negan didn't seem to have any intention of laying in it. Instead, he shoved Rick onto it, bending him over on it and pressing up behind him. He was face down in the mattress and could feel the heat radiating from Negan's erection as he rubbed it on him. And, horrifyingly and humiliatingly enough, Rick felt his own cock twitch in response.

“Let's get these fucking pants off you,” said Negan, yanking at Rick's waistband. He had the man stripped from the waist down in no time, and then Rick could hear the familiar sound of Negan's belt coming unbuckled. Then he felt the hot, hard length pressing against his bare ass and he hissed, and suddenly the remark Negan had made before leaving the room made a lot more sense.

“You know the fucking drill, sunshine,” he said. “You gotta fucking beg me before I'll do anything for you. And don't be so damn shy this time, I really wanna fucking hear how much you need it.”

This time, Rick did not take any further coaxing, both because he knew that he could not get out of it and because of that damned curiosity that made him think he might want this, that he might want Negan to fuck him. “Fuck me,” he said quietly, but he was muffled by the mattress.

“What was that?” he asked, leaning down on him, pressing him further into the mattress. He was not a small man by any means and Rick felt crushed beneath his mass. Of course, he could not muster a clear reply like that, but it was a while before Negan took the hint and let up.

“Fuck me,” he repeated. “Please, just do it already!”

“Nah, don't fucking wanna,” replied Negan teasingly. “You don't really sound like you want it, so I don't think I should. Better wait until you're fucking sure that it's something you want.”

“I...” He had to steel himself and remind himself that this was necessary, but he also didn't take as much reminding as he would have thought, and his doubt about how unwilling this really was grew. “I do want it! Please, fuck me, I want it!” he cried, and he was met with cruel laughter.

“Are you sure? Are you absolutely fucking sure about that, princess?”

“Please,” he pleaded. “I'm sure, just fuck me!”

“Christ, you're a needy fucking bitch, aren't you?” he teased. “Fine, I guess I can fuck you, if it'll get you to stop fucking whining about it!” Rick heard him spit and heard him rubbing his own cock, and he braced himself for what he knew was coming. His ass was spread and he felt the hot tip of Negan's cock pressing against his entrance. This would have hurt a hell of a lot on its own, and Negan had done nothing to prepare him for it, but he was honestly lucky that he had even bothered to use spit. He could have just gone in dry.

Rick whimpered out one last, “Please,” and whether it was for good measure or because he really wanted to beg, he did not know. And then the tip was being pressed inside of him slowly, and all there was was pain. Hot, blinding pain, and he bit his lip to stop himself from screaming, but then he screamed anyway, and he thought he could hear Negan laughing behind him again, but he wasn't sure. He wasn't sure of anything but the pain, but the man just kept forcing himself further in until he was completely engulfed.

The pain no longer burned, but it did not subside, turning instead into an ache as he felt Negan settle in. There was a silence, and then a grunt, and then Negan began to thrust and the blinding pain returned in full force as he rocked his hips, fucking Rick into the mattress. It hurt, it hurt, it _hurt_ , and Rick hated it, but he was getting so hard, he was getting so goddamn hard from this that he didn't know what was happening to him anymore.

“Christ, that kinda fucking hurts,” he heard Negan moan from behind him. “Maybe I shoulda used more than just spit, huh? You're fucking dry as hell.” But he didn't stop, and instead only fucked Rick harder, moaning louder and louder. There was no way those moans could be genuine, they were too loud, too theatrical. But even if Negan was being loud to put on a show, somewhere through that pain, Rick could feel how Negan's cock throbbed- he was loving every second of this.

He grabbed a fistful of Rick's hair as he pounded into him, and the pain of having his hair pulled did not even register in comparison. If he had thought his throat was sore before, that was nothing compared to how much he would be hurting after this, and he was sure that this would not be the last time this would happen. He didn't know why he didn't dread that; he didn't know why it was becoming harder to convince himself that he didn't want this.

Negan locked up suddenly, and with a final groan, spilled his seed into Rick's tight, sore ass, and then he slowly pulled himself out and it was over. At least, for now it was, and Rick could feel the liquid dripping out of him and was sure that if he looked, he would see traces of his own blood. That did not disgust him nearly as much as it should have; none of this did.

The other man's hand was still in his hair and he yanked him up off of the bed, the two standing, and Negan gave a condescending laugh, staring down. Rick followed his gaze, horrified to realize that he was still hard and that he had been caught.

“Fuck, you're actually fucking into this,” he said, shaking his head in surprise. “Can't even say I'm fucking surprised, the way you beg me like that. It was always fucking obvious that there was a slut in there somewhere.”

Rick had not thought it possible to be more humiliated than he already was, but once again, he was brought down another notch. Negan sneered and said, “While it's real fucking tempting to make you beg me to make you come, I got more important business to attend to. You can fucking jack off or whatever. Have fun.”

And with that, he left the room again and left Rick alone, aching from their encounter but still so incredibly, inexplicably aroused. He knew that to do what had been suggesting would be admitting full defeat to himself, would be admitting that this was what he wanted, but he did it anyway.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Not exactly sure where I want this to go from here but I have a feeling this is going to end up longer than three chapters. I have lost control of my life.


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Every day, I hate myself a little bit more for writing this, holy shit. Seriously, I have no earthly clue where I'm going with this or why I'm still going anywhere with it. This ain't my ship, this ain't my jam, I have no reason to be so attached to writing this, but here I am. Hopefully the good lord will smite me before I do too much more damage with this bullshit.  
> Uh, anyway, starting to deviate from the original prompt a bit to include my own kinks and be a little more self-indulgent, cos if I'm gonna write this bullshit, it might as well be my kinda bullshit, ya dig? So, uh, let's pave the way for some forced feminization, and maybe even watersports in future chapters, who knows? Sky's the limit when you don't give a shit!

After he had finished himself off, Rick laid down on the bed on his side, facing the wall. It would have been uncomfortable, but he was more than used to that sort of thing by now, and he had much bigger discomforts to think about. Every move sent fresh waves of pain rolling through him, a reminder of how he had just been used, and his throat hadn't really recovered either.

But worse than that was the weight of what he had just done and the knowledge that it had been entirely willingly. He had been alone, and there had been no one forcing him to do that. It hadn't been a performance, and it certainly hadn't been for Negan's benefit; it had all been for himself, because he had been turned on, because he wanted it, because he had _needed_ it.

So there was no more denying that, for whatever reason, he liked what was happening here. He had entered into this arrangement because he thought he had to, because there was no other choice, and he had not started out as a willing party, regardless of how Negan justified it, but that had changed. Whatever part of him enjoyed being hurt and used and degraded like this had remained silent up to this point, but now it had been woken up.

He wanted this. That was all there was to it, and whether he wanted to want it or not, he was getting it, and if he was getting it either way, he decided to stop thinking about whether or not he  _should_ want it. All that was was him going around and around in his mind, and nothing changed the situation he was in, and nothing changed the fact that he did want this.

He tried to find a comfortable position on the bed, seeing as he was quite exhausted by now, and closed his eyes. It was hard to get comfortable with how sore he was, but at some point, he must have managed, because sleep overtook him, and he slept more soundly than he had in a while.

~X~

When he woke up, he was still alone and he still hurt like hell, but the pain had subsided a little bit. He sat up and winced, wondering how long it would be before he grew used to that. Something told him that it wouldn't be long, and he wasn't sure if that was a good thing or a bad thing.

There wasn't much to do when he was alone other than think, and he found that all he could think about was what could happen next. It didn't seem like there would be anything new for them to try, and he wondered if they would at least alternate between the two things. He wasn't sure if he could handle being fucked again so soon, but he wasn't so sure that Negan would be sympathetic to that.

The best he could do was hope that he would just have to suck the next time, and then he got to thinking about doing that, and then he was imagining doing it again, but this time being given more freedom to do it himself, rather than being so out of control that he couldn't even breathe, much less think. He had never done something like that, but he'd had it done to him a few times before, a very long time ago, and he tried to recall what he had liked about it so that, if he had the chance, he could recreate it.

And then he felt his face flush and he buried his face in his hands, groaning. What the hell was he doing? Sitting here, thinking about what he would do to make it feel good, thinking about how he was going to blow  _Negan_ , of all goddamn people. He didn't hate the man any less, just because he liked what was being done to him. Just because he was giving Rick access to something he had never had before did not mean he liked him or cared about him in any way, so why should he care if Negan liked what he did or not? It was so damn confusing.

Just as he was beginning to think about that, the door slammed open and he didn't have to look up to know who was there. “Honey, I'm- wait, said that yesterday, never mind,” said Negan, striding into the room and slamming the door behind him. Rick wondered if that was just for intimidation or if he did everything with the slam of a door.

He heard something hit the floor and looked up to see that Negan had brought a box with him, but what was in it, he could not tell. Whatever it was, the older man looked excited, even a little bit proud, which only caused Rick's curiosity on the matter to grow.

“Finally came up with a little solution to one of our problems,” was the only explanation he got, and he debated asking what that problem was. Instead, he decided to just wait and watch as Negan began rifling through the box.

“Ta-da!” he declared, pulling out pink fabric- a dress. “See, it's a pretty fucking flawless idea. Once I've got you all dressed up, won't really matter that you're a guy at all! I mean, we gotta give you a good shave, can't have the fucking bearded lady in here, but otherwise...” He chuckled.

He removed a key from his pocket and unlocked another door in the room, which lead to a small bathroom. Having not had anything to drink since he had arrived, Rick hadn't really had any pressing needs where that was concerned, but he still quickly made use of it, in the event that he wouldn't have another chance soon. He heard a laugh from his captor and realized that he hadn't even bothered to shut the door behind him.

“I'll be leaving that door unlocked from now on, so you can come in here whenever your little heart fucking desires,” said Negan, coming in after him and handing him a razor. “As you can see, there's a window, and if you try it, you'll see it doesn't have a working lock anymore. You can fucking leave any time you want and the deal's off. All you gotta do it climb through the window and make a run for it, but just remember that it's all your fucking choice.”

It was almost fascinating, the way he thought he was being generous with that, the way he really believed he was giving a choice. He was a strange man with a strange morality, but that wasn't something Rick had time to puzzle over while he shaved. Once his face was smooth, he turned around to see Negan exit the bathroom and go back for the box, pulling out a makeup bag.

“Where'd you get all this stuff?” asked Rick, the first thing he had said since the door had been opened.

“Borrowed it from some of the girls. You know how the ladies get with beauty and shit,” he said, shaking his head and laughing. “Probably gonna have a fucking heart attack when she finds out I took this stuff though, pretty sure they're trying to conserve it for a special occasion or some shit.”

There was a pause as he dumped the contents out on the counter before he said. “You got any idea how to put any of this shit on?”

“Of course I don't,” replied Rick, not able to keep a bit of snark out of his voice. “What'd you expect?”

“Fuck, I don't know. You sure seemed like a needy little cockslut last night,” said Negan with a lewd grin. “For all I know, this is just another one of your sick little hobbies. Sit down.”

Rick did as he was told, putting the lid down on the toilet and sitting. Negan, unbelievably, crouched down in front of him and took a black pencil in his hand. “It's eyeliner,” he said. “We're gonna keep this real fucking simple, so I don't waste too much of the girls' stuff, but you gotta have eyeliner.”

“And how exactly do you know how to put this stuff on?” he couldn't resist asking.

“I live with a fuckton of women, and they didn't used to be so careful about saving it until it started to run out. Seen 'em put it on plenty of times. Still got no fucking clue if I'll get it right, but I think I picked up a few tricks.” He pulled down Rick's lower eyelid and Rick flinched. “Hold still, unless you wanna get poked in the fucking eye.” It was hard to keep still with the pencil right up against his eye, but somehow Rick managed as Negan drew sloppy lines along his lower lid.

It felt like an eternity, and occasionally the man would slip a bit and swear under his breath, but kept going until he was done. After that, he switched the pencil out for a tube that he twisted and opened, producing a mascara wand. “Eyes open, the whole time. If you blink and fuck me up, I swear...” Once again, Rick had to try to keep still and keep from blinking while his eyelashes were done up. That was a little bit easier than the eyeliner, but barely.

“Keep your eyes open just a little bit more, you blink too hard right after and it'll smudge all to hell.” Putting the mascara away, he pulled out another tube, this one much smaller. Lipstick. “This color looks like shit on all the girls, or at least that's what they keep fucking telling me, so they shouldn't miss it. We're gonna get some good use out of this one. Pucker up.”

Like always, Rick did as told, and allowed Negan to smear the bright red lipstick onto him. He used his finger to dab at the edges a few times, and then pulled back finally, satisfied. “Too bad we don't have any costume wigs or shit like that. It'd be hilarious to see you as a curly blonde. Alright, you can stand up now.”

Rick stared at his reflection in the mirror when he stood. He looked absolutely horrible, with eyeliner much too heavy and uneven, and the mascara had smudged on his upper eyelids and cheeks, despite their best efforts to prevent that. The lipstick looked the most even, but the color was harsh and looked gaudy. All in all, Rick looked like a cheap prostitute, which wasn't too far from the truth, he figured. After all, free was pretty damn cheap.

Negan laughed all the way back into the bedroom, dumping the some things out of the box onto the bed and straightening them out. “I put a change of clothes out for you. Get the fuck in here and get changed, and make sure you put all of it on. Frilly shit too, okay?”

On the bed lay the pink dress, accompanied by a pair of panties, a negligee, and a set of garters, all in pink or black and all lacy. There was even a set of fishnet stockings, much to Rick's horror, but the horror was short-lived. As much as he hated to admit it, he had liked seeing his strange reflection, and it excited him to think about dressing up like this. He was so much more fucked up than he thought, and he set to work getting undressed.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Lord, strike me down now, before I do more of this goddamn story. Someone please stop me, I'm begging you.


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> p l e a s e stop reading this trash and maybe someday I'll stop writing it

When he was dressed, he felt absolutely ridiculous. The clothes were tight and barely fit him, but he was honestly surprised Negan could find something that would even come that close. The stockings were uncomfortable as hell, and it had been really hard to figure out how to attach them to the garters. The dress was tight on his shoulders while the negligee was baggy in the chest, and he didn't even want to think about how the panties must look.

Of course, Negan was positively busting a gut laughing at him the entire time he got dressed, and was practically doubled over by the time Rick was finished. He took a long time to recover, and a few times when he stopped to catch his breath, he got another good look at Rick and was at it again.

Finally, he managed to calm down enough to speak. “Real fucking cute. Bet your little friends wouldn't even recognize you now, you pretty little thing. Christ, this just too fucking funny. C'mere.” He gestured for Rick to come closer, and Rick complied. He reached a hand out and began to fluff Rick's hair, trying to make it look a little bit more feminine.

Evidently, though, he could not create the desired effect and dropped his hand in a huff, nearly pouting. That didn't last long, though, and a grin soon formed once more. “You still look fucking hilarious,” he said. “Guess I'm not as good at makeup as I thought, huh? You look like a cheap hooker! Speaking of which...”

His eyes darkened with lust, making it all the more apparent that he was much more into this arrangement than he would ever let on. “What's my cheap hooker feel like doing today? Suck or fuck?”

“What, you're giving me a choice now?” asked Rick.

“'Course I'm fucking giving you a choice!” he said. “I showed you what each was gonna be like and you now you know. It's your fucking choice what we get to do today. It's all the same to me as long as I get off.”

Was this a sign of tenderness? Coming from someone like Negan, it was hard to tell what would count as that, but he seemed to believe he was doing something nice by letting Rick decide. He didn't know what that meant if really was supposed to be tenderness, though, and he didn't think he would ever be able to figure that out. There was enough complexity just in his side of their arrangement that he couldn't understand; he wouldn't be able to come close to understanding Negan.

“Come on, you got a fucking answer or not?” he asked, snapping Rick out of his thoughts. Negan was staring at him impatiently.

“Suck, I guess,” he said. He knew that there really was no choice in the matter; he would not be able to take being fucked again so soon- he hated to admit that he hoped he was ready for that again soon.

“Did you learn how to do it last time or do I gotta help you out again?”

“I know how to do it,” was all he said, and he blushed at the easy way he admitted that.

“Fucking great,” replied Negan with a chuckle. He sat down on the edge of the bed, visibly hard, and spread his legs to allow Rick to sit on the floor between them. Negan sat back, resting his hands behind his head while Rick reached up to unzip his pants and free his cock.

“See, I figured since getting head from a girl and a guy feels exactly the fucking same, if I dressed you up like this, it really would be the same,” he said. “'Course, you look so goddamn ridiculous, I don't know how much that actually worked, but I got a good fucking laugh out of it, so still a win.”

Now came the part where Rick found out if he actually knew what he was doing here or not. He had thought a lot about what it felt like to have someone suck him off, and what had felt good about it, and what they must have done to achieve that effect, but doing it himself with an entirely different matter, and if he didn't really have an idea what to do, he was sure it would come as a disappointment. Not that he cared if he disappointed Negan, but...

Slowly, tentatively, he opened his mouth and began to wrap his lips around the head of Negan's cock. Immediately, he was met with a hiss that he assumed was one of pleasure, so he kept going, bringing more and more of the length into his mouth. He had forgotten just how much it filled his mouth and how he had been choked on it before. It was true that most of that had been due to the amount of force being used, but the size had certainly been a factor as well.

Fitting as much of it as he could without it being too uncomfortable, he started to lick, rolling his tongue over the shaft, pressing a few places to find where was the most sensitive, paying attention to the way Negan tensed and hissed and groaned. Whatever he was doing so far was working, and he focused on the sensitive spots that he had discovered.

When he had Negan moaning consistently, he switched to sucking, bringing him just a little bit deeper even though it gagged him to do so. He knew that would make it even more pleasurable, and he was sure that if he did this enough, it wouldn't gag him for long. Soon enough, he would get used to this.

“There's a good girl,” the man managed to get out between moans, laying one hand on the back of Rick's head. Even now, he couldn't resist taking some control, and he pushed Rick further down on his cock and then pulled it back, repeating this until they had a steady rhythm going. Not long after, Rick did not need to be guided, and bobbed his head on his own, Negan's hand only resting on the back of his head now.

He could tell when he was getting close and was prepared for the warm burst of liquid in his throat. It did not taste any less strange than the first time, but he swallowed it without any hesitation, and Negan removed his hand. Rick pulled his head back, looking up at the other man, who grinned, satisfied.

“You're getting fucking good at that,” he said, shaking his head in disbelief and chuckling. “And you make a damn good girl when I've got my eyes closed.” He had a good laugh at that one. “So, you want a turn or what?”

Of course, Rick was hard, and it was incredibly uncomfortable what with how the panties restricted him. He wanted a turn quite a bit, but all he said was, “Won't that shatter the illusion?”

“The illusion was never fucking there to begin with, not really,” replied Negan. “Just, take that dress of and lemme look at all that frilly stuff you got on underneath.” Rick complied and once again, Negan had a good laugh at the view. He could only imagine how he looked in such a ridiculous outfit, with the negligee hanging loose due to his lack of breasts and the panties tightly hugging his erection.

“Yeah, you want me real fucking bad. Maybe if you beg me real nice like I like, I'll help you out with that.”

“Please help me,” said Rick pleadingly, without any hesitation. “Please, I want you. I'll do anything you want.”

“Promises like that are how you got yourself into this fucking mess,” he replied with a smirk. “Not that it's been that bad for you, huh? You fucking love it here, and you fucking love what I can do for you. Right?”

“I...I love it, please,” he agreed. “I love what you can do for me. Please help me out.”

“Well, since you asked so fucking nicely,” he replied, his smirk growing, and he practically ripped the panties off and pulled Rick into his lap, taking his cock in his hand.

Rick was ashamed that it took him almost no time at all to finish.


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Omorashi and watersports and other piss related shenanigans because that's my kink lmao. If you don't want that sort of stuff, I suggest skipping over this chapter completely, just like I'm sure the universe wishes I had skipped over writing this entire story completely. Next chapter should be the last one, thank fucking god.

For a few days after that, things continued in much the same way. Negan would return at random intervals and Rick would submit to him, more and more willingly each time, and sometimes he would be made to dress up again- though the makeup wasn't used anymore, most likely because Negan did not want to face the wrath of whichever wife discovered how he had been wasting it first. That was fine by Rick, considering the lingerie by itself was enough to really humiliate him.

Eventually, Rick was ready to be fucked again, and he was grateful that Negan had found something to use as lubricant, though the man had claimed it was for his own benefit because it, “really fucking chafed trying to fuck you with just my spit like that, holy shit.” They still alternated between blowing and fucking, just to make sure he wasn't given more than he could handle, but it didn't take nearly as long as he thought it would for him to grow used to both.

“I wanna try new shit,” said Negan once. “You seem like you're willing to do just about any-fucking-thing, and there are some things I just can't get the girls to do. Any chance you're fucking interested in trying some of the weird shit out?”

“Me dressing up isn't the weird shit?” he asked.

“Well, I don't exactly have to put any fucking effort into getting them to dress like that, do I?” He chuckled. “Dipshit. No, I'm talking about some different weird shit. Some of it is kinda fucking out there, I guess, but it's all shit I've wanted to try for a while. What do you say?”

He thought about asking what exactly all of this entailed, but he realized that there was no point in that. If Negan was being vague, that meant he wanted it to be a surprise, and what it was wouldn't really change Rick's answer. Above all, he had been turned into someone who just wanted to submit and take whatever he was given, and this whole situation had been more than he would have thought he could handle. He knew better than to rule anything out now.

“Yeah, alright,” he said at last. “Whenever you want to do it.”

“Tomorrow morning, bright and fucking early,” was the reply he received. “I'll have everything ready then. But as for tonight, suck or fuck?”

~X~

The next morning, Rick woke up just before Negan came in with a bottle of water and his usual easy grin. He was used to getting food and water from the man, he wasn't being starved in there, but something told him that there was something different about this, despite it all seeming normal. Maybe it was the lack of food being brought with the water, or maybe he saw something different in his captor's eyes, but he just had a feeling that this water bottle meant something more and had something to do with his plans for the day.

“Drink up,” he said, tossing the bottle. Rick caught it and did as he was told, taking a few sips. When Negan stared at him impatiently, he took longer drinks until the bottle was halfway empty. Again, Negan looked impatient. “Can't you drink it any fucking faster than that? Maybe I'm too impatient for this shit.”

He did not give any further explanation, still keeping his intentions vague, though Rick already had an idea of what was going on. Still sipping at his water, he finished it off eventually and waited for some sort of confirmation that what he suspected was true. The confirmation came in the form of Negan rising and locking the door to the small bathroom.

“Temporary,” he said. “Not trying to fucking block of your escape route or whatever, it's just for this. I'll be back later.” He left then, leaving Rick to wonder how all of this was going to play out.

He was pretty sure he knew the gist of it, but as for what came towards the end, he didn't know. All he really knew was that whatever was happening involved him needing to piss, and the rest of the details were unclear. And it was not long before he began to feel a pressure in his bladder, growing a bit more quickly than he was accustomed to, and he wondered if there had been something in the water to help speed this along.

He sat on the edge of his bed, waiting, as the pressure grew to the point that he found himself shifting and bouncing his knees. Clenching one fist, he rested it on his thigh and wondered just how long this would take. He hoped that Negan would return before things went too far and he lost control of himself; he hoped the man would not get distracted by something and forget him here.

When it got to the point that he could not even pretend to sit still and that he was biting his lip and pressing his fist into his crotch, his door opened once more and Negan strode in, grinning once he got a good look at Rick. “Looks like I came back at a good fucking time. You have no idea how fucking boring it is to wait for this kind of thing. Now, I want you to get changed.”

He didn't specify what he wanted Rick to change into; he didn't have to. It was difficult to get into the lingerie with his bladder as full as it was, but somehow he managed. He stood then, for Negan had taken his seat on the bed and he didn't think that the man would want him to sit anymore. Negan would want a full view.

That was fine anyway, sitting down had begun to add unneeded pressure to his bladder and he would have done anything to lessen the amount of pressure on him already. It was really starting to hurt, but he was sure that they were nowhere near done yet. He wanted to ask what he was supposed to do, but he was almost afraid of the answer.

But then Negan answered him without him needing to ask. “Just stand there for me, alright? Just let me get a good fucking look at you, while you piss yourself.”

Of course that was what he wanted. What else could he have in mind? It was certainly humiliating enough, and it made sense why none of his wives wanted to do it for him, and of course, damn it all, Rick found that the idea did not bother him as much as he would have thought. It hurt, waiting like this, and he could not stand still, squirming and fidgeting like a child, but he liked it. Just like every fucked up thing he had done here, he liked it.

So he stood on display, dressed up in lingerie and squirming, already on the verge of losing control. With clenched fists and grit teeth, he fought for control, knowing that the longer he drug this out, the more pleasurable the show would be, but the show would still be coming to an end sooner rather than later. Whatever he had been given to speed this up was doing it's job all too well, and he could feel his control slipping.

When he felt the first spurt escape, he groaned, and there was no way to hide what was happening. The panties were thin, and a small spot appeared, darkening as the stream ran down his leg. Negan's grin spread as he watched, already growing visibly hard. Rick was at the very end of his control, and so he decided there was nothing left for him to do but give in.

Letting out another soft groan, he relaxed and let go. He looked down and watched as the panties grew dark and wet, then translucent as the full torrent was released. The sound of his piss splashing on the floor beneath him almost drowned out his sigh of relief, and, oh, how nice that relief was. It was far from the first time he had been put in a situation where he'd had to hold it until it was painful, but he had never realized just how sweet it was to finally let go and that, coupled with the humiliation of having to do it like this, and in front of someone else, turned him on a hell of a lot more than he was willing to admit.

He'd been saying that a lot lately.

“Yeah, I can definitely see why no one else wants to fucking try that,” said Negan at last, standing. “But I sure as fuck enjoyed it, wish you coulda seen the look on your face. Only problem is, I really fucking gotta piss now, ya know? And there's no fucking way I'm gonna do what you just did.”

Already knowing what was coming, Rick sank to his knees, as Negan continued. “I figure the best solution to this problem is this: you're already fucking soaked. No loss, right?” He could hear the zipper being pulled down and he looked back up just in time to see Negan aiming his cock, and then Rick closed his eyes just before he let loose.

The first bit of the hot stream splashed against the bottom of his face, and he kept his mouth closed as he felt it on his lips, managing to keep his curiosity at bay. Then the warmth spread down, down onto his chest where it soaked through the negligee. He was being pissed on and he loved it; it was so warm it was almost soothing and at the same time was so humiliating that it was thrilling. A whole new meaning to being used. It was so good he did not even have a chance to debate whether or not he really liked it- the answer made itself clear from the beginning.

Despite showing no signs of desperation himself, Negan had to have been holding a lot for the stream to last as long as it did, and when at last it began to trickle to a stop, Rick found himself disappointed. He could only hope that that would be something he would have the chance to receive again.


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> writing this ending was hard because every part of me was screaming that i never touch this story again but, in the end, i couldn't leave it unfinished and i'm sorry  
> god i am so fucking sorry that i wrote this  
> *weak sobbing*

Things went on like that for what Rick figured to be another week. He knew that he had been gone too long, but he was in no position to remark on that and there was still that fucked up part of him that didn't want to. There were responsibilities that he needed to take back up and a life that he needed to live outside of this room, but being a prisoner had not been at all what he had expected, and he had developed a dependency on the treatment he received here, no matter how terrible that treatment sometimes was.

And really, it wasn't that terrible, as far as imprisonment went. He was fed regularly and not made to do any hard labor and he had a place to sleep, and the constant fucking had all too quickly become something he enjoyed. At this point, he was afraid that he enjoyed himself more than his captor did, and the more “terrible” his treatment became, the more he enjoyed it.

It would be bad for him to stay here much longer, because he was needed outside and because he didn't want to become any more attached than he already was. He didn't care for Negan in the slightest, and if he could have had anyone to discover this part of himself with, he would have chosen someone different, but when he was caught up in the moment, that didn't matter to him. All that mattered was getting more, and he could forget who he was with enough to pretend to care.

Negan, meanwhile, was just as imperceptible as always. He'd barge in unannounced and they would fuck or Rick would blow him, and sometimes piss was involved again and sometimes he'd have Rick dress up for him again, but whatever the other man was thinking, Rick could not figure out. There were times when Negan would hang around to talk, telling him about his day like they were friends, like Rick wasn't his prisoner that he liked to fuck and that liked to _be_ fucked. If he didn't know any better, he would think that Negan liked having him around.

~X~

The last time didn't seem like a last time, but that was a cliché that Rick had heard enough times to believe. It started just like any other time, but Negan stalled before they actually got down to it, recounting a story about something that had happened to him earlier that he thought was absolutely hilarious. By the time he was done, he was nearly in hysterics and even though Rick hadn't thought it was all that funny, he caught himself laughing too. The man was so damn happy that it was contagious.

But then he regained his composure, wiping a stray tear from his eye and catching his breath. “Well, I guess you're ready to get your brains fucked out, huh?” He was suddenly serious, for whatever reason.

Rick nodded, even though he didn't need to. Of course he was ready; when wasn't he? And he stripped and bent over the bed like he was supposed while he listened to Negan shed his pants and go for the jar of Vaseline, or whatever it was they had been using as lube. Once again, Rick was grateful for that, as he had found things could be enjoyable being fucked like that, and not just because he was fucked up enough to enjoy being hurt and degraded. Sometimes a little comfort was not a bad thing.

He hissed when Negan inserted two slick fingers, working them deep because he had really opened up during their time together. Biting his lip to hold back a moan, because he didn't want to expose just how much he loved even the simple touches, he relaxed around Negan's fingers until a third was worked in. That was usually his limit, though one painful day they had made it up to four and he wondered if he would ever be able to take the whole hand.

But they were not working on stretching him any further today, and it wasn't long before Negan removed his fingers again and positioned himself behind Rick. He heard the sound of Negan lubricating his cock, and then it was pressed against his hole, hot and hard, just as he needed it. Rick couldn't hold back a desperate whimper, and he wasn't told to beg but he did anyway.

“I want you to fuck me,” he said earnestly. “Please, don't keep me waiting anymore.”

“Holy shit, you're so fucking broken,” Negan said, and probably shook his head but Rick couldn't see. “I don't even gotta fucking ask anymore, it's great.” He still sounded strangely serious.

But Rick didn't get to ponder his tone, and Negan pushed forward, filling Rick swiftly and only a little bit roughly. It barely hurt anymore, he was growing so used to it, and the majority of the pain was just residual soreness from getting so much use. He didn't even need to be touched, all he had to do was relax and let Negan pound into him, thrusting and grunting, and hitting just the right spot to leave Rick a moaning, pathetic mess. Just like they both loved it.

It wasn't anything special for a last time, but it was good. Negan could last a long time, and Rick was getting better at lasting longer under these circumstances, so they both got to enjoy themselves quite a bit before they came, Rick first and Negan a few minutes later. Rick didn't even mind having to support his captor's weight for a bit when they collapsed in a panting heap, but they soon caught their breath and were able to arrange themselves in a more comfortable manner.

“This has been fucking great and all,” said Negan, after a while of silence, “but I can't keep fucking around like this. Once and a while is fine or whatever, but you know how the fuck it is. Can't keep fucking around on my girls, not with the same fucking person, and you've been her a long ass time anyway.”

“What are you saying?” asked Rick, even though he already knew.

“I'm saying, I think it's time we close the fucking curtain on this,” he replied. “This warden-prisoner bullshit. You've been here long enough to prove the fucking point, and if I hold you forever, it's gonna like shitty on me.”

“So I'm being let go.”

“Sure the fuck are.” Negan paused, looking more uncomfortable than Rick had ever seen him. “Unless, you know, you don't wanna leave. And...and I don't mean staying on as a fucking prisoner, or anything like that. But you're a lot of fun, and you make a damn good girl, so if you wanted to maybe join the family, so to speak...”

The offer was so tempting that Rick had to remind himself that to do that would be to turn his back on everything he had built, everything he had fought for, and all for a man he couldn't stand and for a lifestyle that he knew was wrong.

“You know I can't do that,” he said at last.

“What?” Negan snorted. “You didn't fucking take me seriously, did you? I was just kidding, it was a fucking joke.”

Rick knew it didn't matter if he believed him or not.

~X~

He was set free, mostly safe and mostly sound, with everyone crying for a war that he knew would have to come eventually anyway. That had been the plan from the beginning, right? And his brief time in captivity didn't fix anything, did it? He still owed it to everyone to put an end to this and take down Negan for good, no matter what had transpired between them.

In fact, that should only make him want this more, and so he put it as behind him as he could and they pretended as if nothing had happened and fought as if nothing had happened, and this time, Rick was the one to come out on top. This time, Negan was his prisoner.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey, it's over. I hated writing this and I hate this, and I'm never going to stop being sorry, so why do I have an idea for a terrible, even more plotless sequel? Which would involve Rick trying to do a power swap only to realize that he can't be in that position, but he can't let Negan have the power either. The solution? Andrea taking control of them both.  
> OH GOD SOMEONE ARREST ME BEFORE I CONSIDER WRITING THIS OH MY FUCKING GOD.


End file.
